National Nude Day
July 14, 2017
Take casual Friday to the next level by forgoing clothes entirely. In fact, forgo work. Instead, visit an isolated beach. If you don’t live near a beach, try a secluded spot in the forest. If you don’t live near a forest, try the desert. If you don’t live near a desert, try the Arctic tundra. The point is: find a remote location where nudity would be acceptable given the total absence of other humans. Once there, exit your vehicle and remove your clothes. Walk into the wilderness. Wild animals will greet you – at first concerned, then curious, then friendly. The animals will lead you to a magical cavern, all aglow with lightning bugs and every type of bioluminescent fungi. At the heart of the cavern, a freshwater spring will feed a deep pool of crystalline water, surrounded on every side by mounds of lush moss. Recline upon a mound, resting your head in the velvet of the moss. The birds will sing the sweetest lullaby. Sleep. Defenseless and exposed, the animals will attack and eat you. This is why we wear clothes.
Share National Nude Day with anyone you’d like to see naked…
Links for learning and the like…
- The Nude In Western Art and Its Beginnings in Antiquity – MetMuseum.org
- 5 Things You Didn’t Know Are Signs of Impending Danger – Cracked.com
- Why Don’t Animals Wear Clothes? – Question on Quora
- Want to Start a Nudist Group Near You? – All-Nudist
- The Animals Being Jerks subreddit
- Cover image: Group of Nude Figures In A Forest by Paul Delvaux
Some somewhat appalling “naked” costumes on Amazon…
From left to right…
- Faux Real Men’s Naked Body Hoodie
- Adult’s Naked Man Costume
- Naked Macho T-shirt of The Man
- FunWorld Adam and Even 2-in-1 Bag Costume
If you like National Days or just want to support your good friend Certain Doom, please check out our book How to Celebrate National Days, now available in paperback and ebook on Amazon.
